What We Say When We Misuse Mental Health Terms
No one expects you to be a clinical psychologist when you talk to friends, family or coworkers, yet the way we use mental health words can be insensitive to those who suffer from a behavioral health condition.
“It takes a lot of dedicated effort to overcome a serious condition,” said Nicolle Olson, LPC-MH, QMHP, an outpatient counselor with Avera Behavioral Health Outpatient Clinic.
“Words matter. We can inadvertently disrespect people who face these conditions,” she said. It’s not necessary to judge others for throwing around mental health terms to describe everyday behaviors. “But we can lead with empathy,” Olson said.
It starts by understanding what these terms and words mean.
OCD is a Serious Disorder, Not a Personality Trait
When someone is neat, tidy or particular about the ways things get done, they might self-describe as OCD – or have that term used to label their ways.
Olson recommended not using the term OCD for someone who wants things to be done in a particular way, is extensively clean or ritualistic. “Rather describe them with words like perfectionist, meticulous or even fussy instead,” she added.
“Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) can be a debilitating condition where intrusive thoughts, sometimes disturbing, lead to compulsive actions,” Olson said. “Having a clean desk or a zero inbox is not OCD.” People who face this personality disorder often cannot do anything without a rigid set of steps.
Olson said if you feel a strong need to put away dishes or double check the door locks before bed, this is not likely OCD but a way for someone to control their anxiety.
“For example, a diagnosed patient with OCD may be certain that if they don’t check under a bed or say their prayers exactly right, something terrible will happen,” she said. For persons suffering OCD symptoms, they believe their thoughts are real, and it can terrify them.
Watching Our Words About Weight
Talking about someone’s size, be they small, tall, big or tiny, is usually not wise. Using terms like anorexic or bulimic for thinner, smaller people is never OK.
“Anorexia and bulimia are serious, life-threatening conditions,” said Olson. “People suffering these conditions often feel food is the only thing in life they can control.” Anorexia and bulimia behaviors can let them take back some control or be a method to cope with external and internal pressure and stress. “It can also be a way of self-harm,” Olson added.
Feeling shame about one’s body is a topic that counselors often see, and shame about body images causes people pain. It’s likely best to avoid references to weight, height and age altogether.
Energetic People Are Not (Always) Manic
We all know folks who get immersed in their work, or a cleaning the house or garage, and seem to disappear in a frantic cloud of activity. Don’t say “Oh, he’s just being manic or must have ADHD,” said Olson.
Energetic, lively, enthusiastic and bouncy people can just be the way they are – substitute words abound, Olson reminded.
“Mania is part of bipolar disorder, a condition that includes dark bouts of depression and periods of time where the mind races and leads to outbursts.”
She explained attention deficit disorder or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) are conditions, like bipolar disorder, that are not the same as having an intense focus or an overflow of energy.
"ADHD and ADD are now one in the same, and while not exactly the same, they both can show up as times when people have intense energy or focus,” Olson said.
Big Egos and Vanity Are Common – Not Criminal
Thinking highly of ourselves, caring for ourselves or having confidence does not make us a narcissist. Disregard for others, drive for self and being introverted does not mean we are a sociopath.
“Narcissist and sociopath are terms we hear often, especially on television, but these diagnoses are rare and require an individual to meet a specific set of criteria,” said Olson. “Using these terms loosely can create a label for another that is not based on accurate information or actual traits of these disorders.”
Patients who have diagnosed conditions like this exhibit behaviors that are profound and sometimes dark. “Being arrogant or a bit selfish doesn’t mean someone is a narcissist,” she said. “An inability to determine right from wrong or antisocial actions may indicate a disorder. Rudeness, vanity or overconfidence are just traits.”
Educate on Proper Use of Terms
When you hear someone use a mental health term incorrectly to label another, do not attack them. If you can, instead try to share education and perspective. “Never assume they don’t know better,” Olson said. “Take the time to listen with intention and share information.”
Omitting some words – and learning new ones – are part of growth and lifelong learning, and Olson said as we learn, we can change. “What we say is one good way to do that,” she said.
Learn more about Avera’s mental health services.
