It’s always a joy to select gifts for friends and family, and watch their (hopefully) delight when the gift is opened. Buying toys or gifts for kids and hearing their squeals of delight is especially satisfying.
There is nothing wrong with children receiving gifts. But if you are thinking about moderating the frenzy, we have a few suggestions for alternative gifts as well as activities that help children develop the joy of giving.
It Is More Blessed to Give Than Receive
This is a beautiful principle to live out, but one that is not so easy for kids. Here are some ideas.
- For every new toy received, ask your child to find one old toy in good condition that they no longer play with or that they’ve outgrown, to donate. Take your child with you when you donate and find out about the mission of the organization.
- During the holidays, start a paper chain of good deeds. Every time your child does a good deed, they add a loop to the chain. Young children can explain their good deeds at the dinner table. Older children can keep their good deeds secret to learn the joy of giving with no reward.
- Start a holiday change jar. Every time someone does a good deed, a dime or quarter goes in the jar. Then the family goes together to deliver the money to the Salvation Army bell ringers.
- Adopt a child the same age as your own child. Go together to pick out clothes, toys or other gifts. Let your child help select items that someone their own age would like. Check with your local hospital or agencies that serve children and families to see if there are children in need of gifts.
Spread Out the Fun
Instead of kids opening a huge pile of gifts on Christmas morning, save a few for that time, but spread out the rest. Take a cue from the celebration of Hanukah, in which a gift is typically opened on each of the eight nights. In the Christian tradition, you could open a gift on each of the Sundays in advent, on Christmas Eve and on Epiphany, Jan. 6. Open gifts one at a time, so everyone gets to see what was received, and so the giver can be thanked.
Another Toy?
Everyone loves to watch children open toys. Gently remind grandparents, aunts, uncles and friends that an experience or non-toy alternative might be better for your child. These gifts also teach delayed gratification. Your child will need to wait to actually use the gift. This is an important life skill.
- A gift certificate for lessons — swimming, skating, dance, music or anything the child likes
- A gift certificate to attend a special camp — sports, art, cheer
- A membership to the zoo, children’s museum or other venue in your area
- Tickets to a sporting event, play or musical performance
- A book with a note written inside. Choose a book that was special to you as a child or a book with a life lesson and explain it in your note.
- A book of small gift cards for various stores, restaurants, or services that can be used throughout the year
- If your family insists on giving a toy, ask grandparents, aunts and uncles to go together and choose one toy that all the children in the family can use — a painting easel, a building set, a wagon or a yard game.
The Gift of Time
What kids really want most from grown-ups (even if they don’t realize it) is focused time. Give a coupon book of your time — 20 minutes of reading, a walk together, a craft project, 15 minutes of wrestling — or whatever your child might enjoy. Using the internet search “mixes in a jar” and make up some to give your child with a note saying you will bake with them.
Now here’s a hard one for parents in our technology driven world. Decorate a small box. Then give your child coupons for one hour of “technology in the box.” That means you promise to put your device in the box and leave it there for one hour and focus completely on your child. We dare you!
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from Avera Family Life Education.
Learn more about children’s health care at Avera.
